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Tuesday, 4 June 2013

How to Destroy Your Relationship


How to Destroy Your Relationship
 Below are the top ways people ruin their relationships and marriages, injure love, destroy trust and generally make their relationship a miserable experience:

Internet .This may sound unrealistic, but yes, a substantial percentage of relationships are ruined because of the internet. First, most people get addicted to it and give no time or their part to relationship. This in due course will develop a rotten inside of your relationship.
Second, internet is a rich source of a connection provider and not all connections are genuine. Internet offers a wide range of opportunities to be dishonest with your partner. I am not saying that everyone will go for it, but everyone is for sure tempted to develop illegal affairs online.

Spying your partner. Maybe you think that youre doing a favour to yourself and your relationship if you check your partners messages or whats he/she is doing on the internet, but these actions can quickly turn into excessive analyzing and unnecessary worrying about the undertones of your partners behaviour. Besides, you will realize sooner or later that youre missing out on your own life because of ``spying`` on him/her. You wont be able to do it every day of your life. In case you have severe trust issues you can solve the problem in other ways which will benefit you

Making other things your top priority work, computer, friends, TV, sports, children, etc.rather that your intimate relationship.

Lack of affection. Hand holding, hugs, cuddling and physical tenderness is not only erotic and seductive, but its a glue that keeps the two of you feeling close, connected and bonded to each other. Its absence usually means the two of you have grown far apart.

Dishonesty. Its hard to trust someone who doesnt act trustworthywho has deceived, misled or betrayed you in the pastor who is secretive, hidden or withholding of feelings or important personal information.

Stonewalling. Rather than addressing what bothers you, you wall off and stay and walled off for awhile.

Being resentful, angry or hostile too much of the time. Because it becomes increasingly difficult for your mate to say anything to you that youd rather not hear, and over time, it shuts down communication, connection and closeness, because your partner becomes afraid of (or discouraged) from telling you whats on his/her mind or how s/he truly feels.

Being passive-aggressive. Not directly stating how you feel, what you want or what you need, but rather punishing your partner in any number of ways if you dont get what you want.

Being overly critical or argumentative. It makes you annoying and difficult to be around with.Then people will want to avoid you, or theyll become afraid of you. Either one will destroy intimacy and trust.

Being self absorbed or self-centred. Looking out for you, not for the welfare, happiness or contentment of your partnerand certainly not being mindful of whats in the best interest of your relationship.

Not taking accountability for your behavioursespecially your difficult behavioursor feeling so self-justified and self-righteous that you seldom think you owe an apology for your hurtful, insensitive or demeaning words or behaviours.

Control/power struggles. No one wants to be controlled or to feel powerless, and therefore shared power is the only way that really works.

Being walled off. Hard to reach. Emotionally or physically distant, closed or withholding.

Not communicating your needs wants or desires clearly enough, or not treating those needs, as if theyre important.

Seeking stimulation in all the wrong places, through alcohol, drugs, an affair, porn, sports, work or in any other way that ultimately separates or distances you and your intimate partner.

Infidelity or betrayal. This is the worst method ever for attempting to tell your intimate partner youre unhappy, because once trust in ruptured, it is extremely difficult to recaptureand the price is very high. You also, inadvertently, invite a revenge affair.

Having low trust.

Its very hard to be with someone who isnt willing to offer you benefit of the doubt, or who sees your motives as suspect.

Poor listening skills.

Most people talk too much about things that dont, and listen with a genuine desire to understand way too little.

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